Tjaša Ferme    

Two Lovers and a Bear

Year of writing: 2020
An occult romantic comedy about soul mates and the roles we play.
Total cast size: 3 (1 f, 2 m)

young adults, grown-ups

adult, youth
comedy, one-act play, poetic drama, comedy, one act, poetical drama
love, inter-partner relations

Malina and Karst are polyamourous lovers traveling the world.Malina is pondering all the scenarios of what could happen if she actually confessed her love to him. What could go wrong? A lot does - including a murder. We are sucked in by a centrifugal force, pulling us into their subconscious where shamanic and lucid dream elements intertwine. We encounter a spirit guide - a Siberian bear that brings us deeper to their cores and hearts. In the last part, aliens, the mystical, the archetypal and personal clasp hands shedding light on the ways and missions of the soul. 

MALINA and KARST in the Siberian wilderness. By the fire.

KARST
I can’t believe we're here. 
You kinda tricked me into this...

MALINA
Do you have a knife?

KARST
Yeah, I do, three different types and sizes.
Do you think that’s gonna do anything for us?

MALINA
You’ve never used them before?

KARST
No, I have never fought a bear. 

MALINA
Well, there’s a first time for everything.

KARST
Yeah...

MALINA
It’s not guaranteed he will come after us.

KARST
Come after us? We’re not talking about the big bad wolf from Little Red Riding Hood; if he comes, we’re dead meat.

MALINA
Look, the other day I read in the “worst case scenario booklet” that you just have to calmly look at him and surrender your food to him. Or sing something!

KARST
Surrender food? We are food!

MALINA
C'mon don’t be so paranoid, this is exactly why Roman brought us to the wilderness - to face our own demons for a night!

KARST
This was your idea!

MALINA
Maybe we could name him, this way he’ll be more humanized and less terrifying in our imagination.

KARST
Igor!

MALINA
I was thinking the same!

The hologram of a bear shows up.

Then he morphs into a Czech bear cartoon “Medved Uhec” (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdc_6v-ThyI). He is really curious, and he bounces his head a lot.

He brings corn on the cob and marshmallows. It is obviously somebody dressed in a bear costume, but MALINA and KARST act really respectfully as if he is a grand elder. They eat and look at each other, then MALINA gets up.

MALINA is rehearsing her Russian phrases.

Two lovers and a Bear

Language of translation: English

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